Episode Transcript
Speaker 1 00:00:02 You know, Nike wasn't wrong when they designed their ubiquitous slogan. Just do it. In fact, science is now telling us that the attitude of just do it may be the key to unlocking the life you want. But we're not meaning to z glib about such a difficult concept. Obviously, we would all just do it if we could. So how can we make this catchphrase a reality? Well, that's what we're diving into today as we unpack how to use the idea of compliance as key to making powerful shifts in your relationship and life. Hey, we're Kim and Raj, and we're here to show couples how to get the best out of their relationship so they can start living their dream life together.
Speaker 2 00:00:42 We're a west Aussie couple who are living the life of our dreams. We don't entertain the word should we think about the future as a field of possibilities, and we'll let joy be our compass. We've
Speaker 1 00:00:51 Taken the simple idea of working as a team and applied it to our marriage, and it's been a game changer, allowing us to work out what truly lights us up in life and to go after it together.
Speaker 2 00:01:00 From living in snowy Japan to starting our own house ripping business, we've achieved some big dreams, and most importantly, we feel fulfilled and are having the most fun we've ever had.
Speaker 1 00:01:08 Pick conversations from inspiring couples, thoughts from relationship experts and tales from our own lives as we help you to gain the wisdom and skills you'll need to turn your relationship into a real team. These
Speaker 2 00:01:18 Are relationship conversations for real people, by real people. So sit back, get comfortable, whatever tickles you, pickle, and enjoy living the team life.
Speaker 1 00:01:34 So today's podcast is about a concept called compliance is the science. If it sounds a little strange, don't panic. We're really gonna get into what that is and what that means. But the first thing I just wanna talk to everybody about is why we've brought this topic to the podcast today. And I know that in our first podcasts we've released, we've really spoken a lot about how to become a team. And we've done that because we know that's the first part of what we're wanting to achieve with living the team life. We really want couples to work towards becoming a team. It's a super important foundation for doing anything else with the relationship. And by anything else, I mean living your absolute best lives, following your dreams. We're all about becoming a team so that you can follow your dreams. And when we break our dreams down, what are, what our dreams, but a set of goals and actions we wanna undertake, changes we want to make that will get us towards our goal and ultimately our dream. So today is actually about that part of things. It's about the dream part of things. It's about setting the goals, it's about making changes. How do we go about making changes? Because making changes can be really hard. And we wanna share with you today this, this incredible, this skill we've learned for how to make changes and stick with them. It's been, it's been a really powerful part of our life, and that's the concept that we are referring to that's called compliance is the science.
Speaker 2 00:03:12 I think we've all over the years seen something that we wanted to achieve, but then either not starting or given up and, and that's why we haven't achieved it. Uh, whether that be, you know, a diet or exercise regime, I, I guess they're probably the two biggest ones. Uh, side hustles, uh, hobbies, playing the, the guitar or something like that, that
Speaker 1 00:03:35 Relationships are things like, you know, regular dates,
Speaker 2 00:03:38 Regular dates, uh,
Speaker 1 00:03:39 Reviews of how things are going in the relationship, you know, these sorts of things that people are like, oh, I really wanna get that started and get that going for the good of the relationships.
Speaker 2 00:03:47 The camper trailer you bought but never actually used. Yes, it sits in the driveway, you know, and especially with social media these days, we see so many people doing such cool and amazing things, uh, and and we wanna be them, right? We want to feel the feeling that they're getting when they're out on these boats or these guys with these amazing bodies. Um, we see, well, you're
Speaker 1 00:04:08 A marketer's dream. You wanna feel
Speaker 2 00:04:09 That feeling. I wanna feel that feeling. You know, we see people cooking things up that are like five star Michelin chef quality, uh, you know, all we
Speaker 1 00:04:18 Become a superstar in the kitchen for three days and then
Speaker 2 00:04:21 Exactly. Um, and, and you know, so we buy the global knife set. You know, we buy the Japanese, you know, you know, the 20 centimeter knife, you know, we see people making six figure side hustles. So we go out and buy all the equipment or we spend, uh, $500 coming up with a cool name for our side hustle, but never actually go and achieve it. And, you know, of, of course, this can actually leave us with feeling like we're not good enough. That what was the point in trying in the first place? And, and this happens again and again. And, and some of the reasons can be, um, you know, maybe a lack of self-belief where we feel these things are una table, we're not good enough to achieve them. A fear of failure, which is something that I had when I was younger. I was like, well, geez, like that seems pretty unt so why should I even start in the first place if I'm just gonna fail anyway? And especially if you have failed at some things previously, you can see how it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. They seem too complex. Uh, and I know even though something might have five steps to achieve it, you find that you dig below the surface actually way more complex than that. Whatever it is we're doing, we're just not achieving the things we want done.
Speaker 1 00:05:31 Yeah, there's, you've, you've talked there, Roger, about some of the excuses that show up. And I don't mean excuses has such a negative connotation, right? It has a sense of judgment and I don't use it in that way. Excuses are just thoughts that we tell ourselves when we haven't done what we wanted to do. So no judgment from us on that. That's just, we're just explaining how the brain seems to show these things up, which is, you know, fear of failure. Some of these things that, that show up are, we don't have, I don't believe I can manage that. You know, these are the things you talked through. One of the other big, uh, excuses, uh, that shows up or um, reasons that people give why they haven't managed to achieve something or follow through on a goal they set for themselves is willpower. And we've heard a lot about this in the PD space in recent years.
Speaker 1 00:06:20 Just man up, just be enough. You know, and you'd see a lot of this sort of language on social media, but willpower is another thing that science is telling us is actually not the answer to trying to do new things or to try and make things a, a habit or part of your routine. In fact, science is telling us that willpower is pretty useless because it's impacted by so many other factors. The environment, the mood you're experiencing, the time of day that you're trying to do something. And it's really inconsistent. You never know when you're going to have a surge of willpower. Sometimes it comes, sometimes it doesn't. So relying on something that you have absolutely no control over is not gonna be really helpful in, in starting or continuing a new habit or making a change that you wanna make.
Speaker 2 00:07:09 And I think part of this is, especially when we're on Instagram or we're looking at training plans or diet plans or anything like that, is we're starting to set goals based on how we've seen other people achieve them. We, we see someone looking great having great abs, and we go, okay, sweet, I'm gonna eat nothing but bone broth for lunch every day for two months. Okay, no worries. The problem is, is we see them do that, and we believe if we don't do it exactly the way they do it, it means we won't achieve not just their results, but any results whatsoever. And we feel like if we miss one training session, one run in the week on that Wednesday, that all of a sudden there's no way we could achieve running a half marathon. So we think we failed and we think we are never gonna achieve anything we set out to do.
Speaker 1 00:07:55 I think you've hit the nail on the head. We look to these dreams and these goals that other people have achieved and we try to emulate them as they've achieved them. There's two parts to that. One, when you see them achieving these goals, they've already been doing it for a very long period of time. So they've already set the habit so it's automated for them. They're, they're not needing the same sort of mindset or this, and they're not making the same sort of changes that require such a huge amount of energy when you begin a new habit. So that's one part of it. But the bigger part for us is they've created those habits and made those changes and are following those dreams and goals based on the context of their life. It works for them within their life. And that's what we're talking about today when we talk about compliance is the science. It's about finding out what works for us in our lives. It's not a one size fits all approach in life. It's a one size fits one. We operate within our own unique context as humans with our own history, personality, genes, experiences, all of those things we have to take into consideration when we're working out what's going to work for us when we wanna make change.
Speaker 2 00:09:06 What's the likelihood of you succeeding to have the same sort of body as a personal trainer on the internet who literally does personal training for a living? Because the workouts they might be putting up and the meal plans they're doing work for them. When we talk about compliance is the science, what we're really talking about is doing something in a way that allows you to consistently work towards that goal, work towards what you want to achieve again and again and again
Speaker 1 00:09:34 Ex Exactly. And, and just keeping in mind that whole idea that how your, how you are going to go about it is going to look different to how someone else goes about it. And the best way to think about that is to think about what the outcome or intention is around the goal, rather than thinking about the process as your guideline be outcome or intention based. What is it that I'm trying to get out of this goal? And then figure out your own path. Whatever way we get there is okay, it's the way that works for us. Yeah.
Speaker 2 00:10:07 It's not about how you achieve it, it's really about rocking up when you need to in the way you need to. Yes, yes. So setting yourself up for success. A great example I think was me last year when I, I lost quite a bit of weight and it, it was mostly to do with diet. So I, I've always exercised quite a lot, but I've always been of the opinion, oh, I can eat and drink whatever I want. Now. 40 years old, you actually can't do that. So last September I set myself for a plan that worked for me and I've tried lots of diet plans, I've tried lots of exercise plans, you know, and the outcome I wanted was to lose a certain amount of weight. And I, I didn't actually think I was going to achieve it either. That was the funny thing. I was like, I'll give it a crack.
Speaker 2 00:10:51 But I did go, okay, do you want, I'm gonna do something that works for me. I'm gonna reduce the amount of calories in my diet, but I'm not gonna do that by fasting. I'm not gonna do that by, you know, skipping meals or only eating bone broth or cutting out carbs altogether, which a lot of people do. But after six weeks is really, really hard. Yeah, I set myself some simple rules. I can eat whatever I want for the three meals a day, literally whatever I want. But between those meals and after at dinner, I can't have any, any snacks or anything in between. And what you find is I'm not actually having, uh, Canadian bare pancakes with, um, bacon on them every morning for breakfast. I, I, I am eating sort of pretty well anyway, but that calorie deficit started to work for me and that's something that I could achieve.
Speaker 2 00:11:43 I still had my beers at night if I wanted, I could still eat, you know, a steak and fries and all that sort of things. And what happened is I was able to do this for more than just two, three weeks. I was able to do this for about four or five months. And the accumulative effect of me just having a fewer calories in my diet every day maybe end up losing quite a bit of weight. Now, for me, that is almost case in point of how compliance is the science. There are a thousand, a million different ways to lose weight out on the, on the internet, on social media. And I think most people would've tried them, and this is one that worked for me, but if I gave that to someone else, it might not work for them.
Speaker 1 00:12:26 I think there'd be a lot of, uh, health professionals out there saying, well, that's not healthy. That's not this, that's not that. Yeah. But the point is, your outcome was weight loss. That's what you were shooting for. You weren't shooting for really increasing your exposure to micronutrients. You were shooting for weight loss.
Speaker 2 00:12:46 I wasn't trying to balance my gut, my gut bacteria, I wasn't trying to reduce my alcohol intake. Um, these are things that yes, that would be great if I did them in the future. My main goal was to get my body down to a, a, a, a better weight than it was, which actually really helped me in terms I got faster or my runs. And also after seeing the results after three months, I then was more motivated to stick to that diet as I went forward.
Speaker 1 00:13:14 Yeah, absolutely. I, I just think this is such a great example of tailoring something to yourself and being outcome focused. You wanted to do weight loss and what you had to do is actually go away and reflect on what is going to be the best plan. For me, that is a deliberate plan. You didn't just go into this with a floaty idea. We all know you need to be deliberate about what you're going to do and when you're going to do it. And you said, this is what I'm going to do. I'm going to eat my three meals at mealtime. Nothing outside of that. You were very specific. So when you began your day, you knew what the plan was.
Speaker 2 00:13:51 Yeah. So the science was, I was able to comply with my diet on a consistent basis month after month after month, you know, to break it down. That's what we mean by compliance is the science. When you're trying to make change, when you're trying to, when you're trying to achieve your dreams, you have to do things that are repeatable. And things that are repeatable are things that you are less likely to come up against roadblocks that will seem ins surmount. So when Kim talks about willpower on the days, you don't have the willpower, they become more habitual because you've rocked up, you've gone and done the work, or you haven't eaten the snacks for, for weeks and weeks and months and months on end.
Speaker 1 00:14:32 Yeah. And I think the compliance is the science thing. The other part of that is understanding that the brain needs to see progress, right? Yeah. It needs to see you doing the activity. Now the progress doesn't have to be perfect for it to have registered the progress and, and want to continue on that path. That's the motivation it gets. That's the drive it gets from that. And this is the beautiful part. Compliance is the science is saying just turn up and comply to what you've set out to do work working towards that outcome. That's what you wanna do, right? You wanna work towards that outcome, just comply with that intention to work towards that outcome. It's not saying perfection is the science. And I think that's where a lot of people get lost, you know, oh, I failed today to do the 50 minutes I said I was gonna do, so I'm not gonna do any.
Speaker 1 00:15:25 That's one of the big things. And I guess that's what I'll talk about from my perspective. And my story is I, I've always been a very fit person. I've always run and done lots of different, various forms of exercise, but, but a long distance runner my whole life. So 26, 27 years and after having our daughter, I was really struggling to get back into regular fitness. It just, it w I mean, obviously being a new mom, you've got all those things. We spoke about those excuses, and again, I do not use the word excuses. Judgmentally excuses is just, it describes what you say to yourself when you didn't do what you wanted to do, right? That's it. There's no judgment in there. It's just a fact. So I had all those reasons in my mind for why I wasn't managing to do the thing. And what I actually discovered was when I just showed up with the intention to do exercise, not necessarily do it perfectly the way I would want to, I didn't wanna, you know, I had been setting these goals of 45 minutes a day and it needs to be really intense.
Speaker 1 00:16:32 I just showed up with the intention to exercise and if it was one minute, five minute, what, whatever it was, I wanted to consistently exercise five times a week. It's really, really good for my mental health. And I knew that. And once I worked that out and there were days, let me tell you where I did next to nothing in terms of exercise. I mean, I would do a nine minute wait set and be like done. But I was complying with my intention to have regular five day a week exercise. And from there I built the momentum. So for me, compliance was really important. Now I've got that automated habit. Now I want to ex, I'm looking for the five times a week my body's got used to it again, it's craving it and cravings apart of setting habits, I crave that feeling that I get again, which is just so lovely to have back.
Speaker 1 00:17:22 But in the beginning when I look back, how did I get back into this? It's really compliance as a science. And I will say even now with these automation set up where I find it so much easier, there are days, and this is where willpower comes in and why it's so useless. There are days when I am having and absolute rotten day when I feel low on energy, when I feel exhausted in terms of parenting, I'm just, I'm at my absolute wit's end with the last thing I feel like doing is pushing myself in another arena. My willpower is gone. There is nothing left. I've used it all up being a parent that day. That's why compliance is, the science is so powerful because I know that if I just do a little bit, I've done what I intended to do and exercised. And sometimes that looks like 27 minutes of very easy weights in front of Netflix. If that's all I can manage, it's okay. And I give myself a huge pat on the back when I'm finished because I've complied. And you know what, the next day I wake up and I don't even think about it, I just think, oh, I complied yesterday. And off I go, I've got the momentum. I'm off on my, I'm off back back. I'm back up and running because I'm not feeling so low anymore. I haven't got all those other things going on. And I just get back into the
Speaker 2 00:18:36 Routine. Yeah. And I think, um, you know, you actually missed it there as I remember when you started. 'cause you have been a runner your whole life and you identify as a runner. Oh
Speaker 1 00:18:46 Yeah.
Speaker 2 00:18:47 But when you started back, you started doing very low kilometers and very low speed compared to what you used to do <laugh>. And and I think a lot of people feel that like when they, 'cause like, oh, I wanna learn to run, but oh, I can only run k, just do it. Start small. Just do it. It works for you. Right? That, that's the whole point,
Speaker 1 00:19:06 Right? Yes. So do you know you're right. I actually went and saw an exercise physiologist. I've skipped that step. Um, who explained the importance of that to me? And you are right, I did have to go backwards to go forwards because that's where my body was at. I hadn't run for so long over distance. My mind and body were not prepared to run what I used to run.
Speaker 2 00:19:27 So you had to do something that worked for you to get back in the habit of something that even you used to do habitually for, for 20 years. Yes. Uh, so look, Kim and I just gave some examples of diet and exercise, right? And they are generally the most common ones, especially that people will, they'll start and, and stop after a few days, or they'll never start in the first place on a new diet because it, it just doesn't work for them. But this works in all other parts of your life. And I think what we want to do, obviously on living the team life, we have advice for couples, um, and strategies on how you can become a team to, to achieve your dreams. So what we wanted to do is break down one of the, one of the ones we often talk about, uh, one of the strategies. Uh, we can,
Speaker 1 00:20:14 One of the changes that you can, one
Speaker 2 00:20:15 Of the changes we make in your relationship to get, you know, to get you in sync, to get you on the same page, to get you talking, uh, to get you spending more time together. And that is active dates, which you've heard of us talk about. You see it on our socials all the time. Yeah.
Speaker 1 00:20:29 Active dates are such an important thing. And if you've seen it popping up and you're wondering why these guys bang on about active dates, we have spoken about the science behind being outdoors, movement, all of those sorts of things. And the chemical reactions that you have, the connection that, that you experience. The bonding that goes on. Yeah.
Speaker 2 00:20:47 Creating a space for talking and the relationship outside of everything else in the world.
Speaker 1 00:20:51 Absolutely. And we honestly believe these are one of the most powerful things you can do as a couple, especially when you're trying to reconnect. So if you're at that starting phase and you're working towards becoming a team, that's not where you're at right now. Going on active dates is a really great way to start to reconnect.
Speaker 2 00:21:10 So what we want to do is break down how compliance is the science can work for you on an active date. Because for example, Kim and I are going on a bush hike tomorrow. We're going out to the Perth Hills. We're gonna go on an eight K bush hike. It'll probably be a bit wet, be be a bit slippery, we'll go on run a fairly advanced trail. But we're going to use that time to get back in sync after a tough week to talk things out, talk about our dreams, talk about life and touch base with each other. Now, an eight K bush hike isn't achievable for everyone. You know, Kim and I do tennis, kayaking, swimming, go to the beach, do all these things. And we do them, we try to do 'em weekly if not fortnightly. But what we're saying here is, although we are encouraging everyone to do active dates, you need to do what works for you. Step one of compliance is the science in terms of active dates is what does an active date look like for you?
Speaker 1 00:22:06 A hundred percent. Roger, it's, it's such a great example. It might look nice when we throw up a few photos from tomorrow and people might go, yeah, let's go for a hike. But that is a huge goal. If that's not something you do regularly, you, you are, you're gonna need a lot of willpower, you're gonna need a lot of those sorts of things to get to that level so quickly. And the reality is, as we've spoken about, willpower isn't that readily available. So you need to start creating the habit. And to create the habit, you have to do what works for you. You need to minimize the resistance, do what works for you. So we would say, let's look at the outcome, like we said, what's the outcome here? The outcome of going on an active date is movement together. That's what you're trying to achieve, movement together. So then you just look at movement together and say, what could we do that feels achievable for us? What would be a starting point, A kicking off point? And it might be something like, let's walk to the coffee shop and grab a coffee together.
Speaker 2 00:23:06 Yep. It might be one of us walks the dog once a week, I'm gonna join you for that walk to walk the dog. It could be going and playing a game of mini golf. It's 15 bucks. I don't think there's anyone who can't play mini golf. It's one of those simple little things. But if you think that, okay, I have to do active dates like Kim and Rod, so I'm gonna go buy a tennis racket, I'm gonna go buy some hiking boots. Um, we're gonna have to plan this out. I can see how you could on a Saturday look outside and go, oh, it's getting a bit wet. Oh God, do we really have time to drive 40 minutes? Oh, I don't really feel like an eight K walk where you go, oh, I'm not gonna go do that. I'm not gonna achieve it. Or you do it once and go, that was great, but I don't really like walking eight k up a hill like that. That's not, that's not me. I, I don't really like it. So you could see how easy it would be to not go and do it because that's what Kim and Raj do. But if you find something that works for you, an activity you either enjoy or even if it's just something as simple as going and walking up the street and getting a coffee together or just having a chat, then all of a sudden you are doing, yeah, you're doing something that works for you and something that can be repeatable, replicable.
Speaker 1 00:24:10 Yeah, absolutely. Step two for following compliance is the science is to start small and habit stack. So we've spoken throughout this podcast already about the merits of starting small, not setting those, those goals so big because what you're wanting to do is build that momentum so that the brain's getting the feedback of what's actually happening when they undertake this activity, that they get a reward from it, et cetera. So habit stack is such a brilliant way to start a new habit because you take a habit that you already have and you just stack one onto it. That means you've already got automated into your system. 'cause habits are automated actions that we take, which means we use a, we use very little conscious mind and energy to undertake them. They just happen naturally. That makes them quite effortless. Starting a new habit requires a lot more effort, a lot more consciousness to make it work.
Speaker 1 00:25:00 And so when we add that habit to one, we already do, we actually steal a little bit of the effortlessness that we already have in place. For example, say you walk the dog every Sunday morning and you say, you know what? I'm in a habit stack and I'm gonna, my partner's going to come with me for that walk and wet. That's going to be our movement together. Because what we are wanting to do is have an active date. So I'm going to have it stack that active date on top of my regular Sunday dog walk. And it's going to happen far more easily because you've already got the time set in your brain. It's already automated, ready to go.
Speaker 2 00:25:34 Yeah. So you know, really what we're saying here is start small. So if you wanna start running, go for a one or two K run or just go for a walk and get the habit of going out in the air with your trainers on if you want to do a diet, you don't have to do what I did. But the way I did it in compliance of science is I started small by not trying to eliminate all carbs outta my diet. Not trying to change the whole way I ate food. Just when I ate it, I could still overindulge at dinner and you find you actually don't, but I could still do that every now and then. So that, that was a small step. And habit stacking is similar because you are trying to do something, you're trying to add onto something you already do. So it's making it small bite-size, achievable actions.
Speaker 1 00:26:19 Yeah, absolutely. So step three. So if you're wanting to start active dates, we've given you step one of compliance is the science. Do what works for you. Step two, start small and habit stack. And step three, which is my absolute favorite because this is what really works for me in compliance, is the science is just do it. Just do it. Like I said, there are days where showing up to do my exercise in a way that I had intended, which might be out in the sunshine and doing a 40 minute set of weights isn't mentally possible for me. I haven't got the willpower for it. So I ask myself, what is possible? What could I manage right now? Anything that goes towards the outcome I want, which is to have exercised today, now literally five minutes of exercise is still exercise. I will have ticked that outcome.
Speaker 1 00:27:12 I will have had that momentum. My brain will have got the reward. I'm gonna give myself a pat on the back and tomorrow I'm gonna feel absolutely fine when I get up and get back on track. What is the one thing I could do to achieve that outcome no matter what it looks like? And there's, this is the beauty of it, because you're taking judgment away from setting habits. One of the most prohibitive things we have is the negative self-talk, which Roger spoke about at the start. And that's really all about judging yourself. Stop judging yourself, give yourself a break. Just doing it is doing it. That's all you need to be doing. Yeah,
Speaker 2 00:27:43 And I think that where a lot of this, you know, when we talked earlier about fear of failure and all that comes from the fact we've got this idea of perfectionism. We have to be perfect before we start or we have to have everything set up and ready to go. Kim and I used this when we started this podcast. At first we were like, okay, these are the 10 things we need to do <laugh> before the podcast starts. But as we got closer and closer to our launch date, we realized, geez, we haven't done half of those things or not to the quality that we want them, but we knew we had great content. We knew we had an idea, we really believed in. And we thought, do you know what, we'll use the minimal viable product model, which is getting out what you need to and making a start.
Speaker 2 00:28:25 And we did. And if we'd waited for things to be perfect, we might not even have launched our first episode. Now we're up to episode like 25 now because we started back in March. Now we're we, we feel we're really growing as podcasters. We're able to focus on other parts of our business because the actual writing our, our, our show notes and doing our research and coming together and record the podcast is actually become a habit. And it's become more automated. It's easy to do. We have it, stack it because we do it before lunch on certain days of the week. We started small because we knew, yes, we're just gonna do the podcast. We're not gonna try to do all the other amazing digital video stuff we wanted to do. I
Speaker 1 00:29:06 Love that. It's such a great example because we did start out with a plan that was grand and had us achieving all of the video work with TikTok and YouTube and things like that that we, we are not even working on yet. We had wanted to do that at launch, but what we, what we went back to the drawing board and said is hang on, what's our, what is our intention here? What was our goal here? And it was to launch the podcast. We had set a date for that, which was our wedding anniversary. And we had said, we wanna launch the podcast. Well then let's do that. Let's do that minimum viable product. Let's launch that podcast. And that is not to say we hadn't put a ton of work that was launched as with the, with the amount of effort that we had expected to be put into it.
Speaker 1 00:29:49 We just took away all the additional things that would've been nice to have. But they weren't necessary for us to comply, to comply with our goal to launch the podcast. We just had to stay focused on the podcast. And so that's what we've done. We've done our core work and we've worked really, really hard on that. And now that we've got that habit going of producing the podcast, now just now we are starting to add bits into it because we've got the capacity. Because this has become a habit and it's become far easier. It requires far less effort for us to do it.
Speaker 2 00:30:21 A hundred percent. And in terms of the active date, how you use this is if it's raining outside, put the rain jacket on. Just say, let's go book a session at the local mini golf club. You know, just say to your partner, Hey, let's just get out of the house. Let's walk up the street. Let's just do something. Let's just go to the beach. Just the two of us we're saying start, you know, if you start, start small and do what works for you, you are going to achieve what you want to achieve.
Speaker 1 00:30:49 All right, Roger, so that was compliance is the science. Tell me what your gold nugget outta that was.
Speaker 2 00:30:54 It's really just about doing what works for you. So I think the fact that is, if you sit there and think, oh, because I'm not doing it like the influencer, like the personal trainer, like the movie star,
Speaker 1 00:31:06 Like I imagined it in my head,
Speaker 2 00:31:07 Like I imagined it in my head that I'm not doing anything. It's like zero or a hundred. No one is better than zero, two is better than one. Oh, I
Speaker 1 00:31:17 Love that. I love that. Couldn't agree more. For me, that ties straight into the just do it. Just do the one. That's it. One out of a hundred is better than zero. And that is awesome. Stop judging yourself. Stop. Stop flagellating yourself for not being perfect. Let's just do the one. It will amaze you where one can take you.
Speaker 2 00:31:41 You are amazing. You've just spent quality time on your relationship.
Speaker 1 00:31:45 Feel out you're on a role. If you want more living, the team life, relationship, insights and conversations, head over to Kim and roger.com where you can find all the show notes as well as tons of other relationship goodies.
Speaker 2 00:31:55 And if you like today's episode, please hit subscribe or let another couple know where they can find us. It'll make them happy and it'll make us really happy.
Speaker 1 00:32:03 Until next time, keep on living the team life.
